Master BBB has been feeling rather drained lately. I don’t blame him one bit and I just wanted to echo his sentiments.
I know exactly what he’s going through.
Sometimes I yearn for the days when my blog was little known and I was getting under 100 hits a day. I could write whatever I want and be damned with what readers think. I made a comment in BA chat one day that writing a blog is akin to a parent-child relationship: Both want to be like the other.
The kid wants to grow up because he wants to do all the cool things that adults do like drive cars and watch R rated movies.
The parent wants to be young again so they don’t have to worry about all the responsibilities.
I suspect the same semblance here applies to blogging or at least in my case.
Between the time I started my blog last year and now, I some how became an authority. I don’t know where it came from but when you start getting a steady stream of a 1000 visitors on a daily basis, people read you for a reason. Whether it’s to laugh at you, to read about you, to find out more about you, they’re there for a reason.
I’ve always written my blog to teach because healing is not an innate skill. It can be easy to pick up but it can also be difficult to master and at the core of, I am here to teach. That doesn’t mean I can’t learn. I guess it’s always been a little easier for me to adapt to then the Bear since his blog was first for himself and for his buddies and pals. I’m a long term thinker and I knew that if I kept plugging away at writing and blogging and healing, I would reach a point where several things will happen:
- People start disagreeing with you
- People start emailing you
- People start looking up to you
A great case in point are my two posts on Karazhan and Zul’Aman requirements. if you look at the comments, you’ll see like 50+ comments combined telling me that I’m wrong, or that my numbers are off, or that certain classes aren’t required and so on and so forth. There’s also comments that say “Great starting point” or “Excellent guide” and the like.
When you enter the public light of blogging, it helps to have extremely thick skin. I credit Doc Holiday for having toughened me up for the past several years with his constant slandering and demeaning ways. Of course he’s joking, but after a while you learn to not let it get to your head anyway.
Writing for WoW Insider is incredibly different then writing for our own respective blogs as BBB would surely attest to. Our audiences are different, our expectations are raised, and we have a job to do.
I know I’ve expressed retirement many times in the BA chatroom. But I know if I did that, I’d pull a Niedermeyer and come back around Christmas. I would rather not leave at all. Some days you’re the pigeon, other days you’re the statue.
Bear, TJ’s words were right on the money. There’s got to be a reason for you to do something and it’s not necessarily always fame. While we may not always agree (DEVILS SUCK), she is incredibly blog savvy. She knows what to expect and what will happen because she’s done this whole blogging thing for a while now.
So to all of you young and aspiring bloggers out there, be careful what you wish for. The responsibility and the workload you ‘feel’ is tremendous.
When I first started playing hockey as a goalie, I was terrible. I’d let in like 10 goals per game. However, to be fair we were playing half court and I was the only netminder (teams had to carry the puck back to the center line and then cross back again if possession changed, similar to basketball). I’d get teased, belittled, degraded by my friends but I knew they were joking and I knew they were also trying to get me fired up so I’d play more and prove them wrong. My first stint in backyard hockey, and I came way out of the net way out of position allowing easy goals to go in. I didn’t have faith in my team allowing the opposing team to set up “back door” plays where they would utilize 3 or 4 different people to get me confused. But I kept plugging away at it, played as often as I could, read as much I wanted to in order to get better. Fast forward a few years later, now I’m communicating with the players in front of me more.
2-on-1 plays don’t work as much as they used to because I’ll keep shouting to the player in front of me to “block the pass” while I “take the shot”.
Criticism is always going to be inevitable and the degree of which will range from stinging to “ouch, that actually hurt”. I have never listened to any of the podcasts that I’ve done. I also don’t often read the comments I get on my WI columns (I get Wyn to do it for me and she sends me all the good ones). Major insecurity Matt, shame on yourself, right? I’ll grow out of it sooner or later.
Despite all my responsibilities, all the things that I want to do on my blog, on WI, in the BA chat, and otherwise, there’s a great crew of people that I know of that have my back. And whether Bear knows it or not, he’s got some staunch supporters covering his furry backside as well.
Every so often I’ll question myself, my purpose here, my blog, etc. BA Chat’s used to it by now because I often scream “RETIREMENT”. Sometimes when I’m not doing anything, I’ll wonder what would have happened if I never played WoW or started blogging. Sometimes I want to throw it all away and I came close to doing so at one point (then I met Wyn, but shh, don’t tell her that. Her ego’s getting as large as mine). Sometimes I wonder if there’s anything I could have done differently on my blog or if I could trade it for anything else in the world.
Then I realize that I wouldn’t trade any of it for the world. I love what I’m doing. I love to write and to teach and if I had to do it all over again and endure every pain staking email and comment I’ve ever received, I’d go through it all over again because this job and hobby rock just like every single one of you who read this blog.
A quick WHOIS query shows that worldofmatticus.com was created on August 18. We’re coming up on one year. If it were possible, I’d hold like an e-barbeque and serve up some e-steaks and e-beers. I wonder how tasty e-tauren would be. I’d love to do something special, but I’m not quite sure what.
Keep your chin up and hold your head high.
